The Early Signs of Manipulation

We have been doing a major financial over-haul at Chez Vinson. We've got stuff paid off, paid down and ready to be out of our in-box and put into savings. It's been really exciting. Salem will be attending pre-K in the fall, which means we'll be able to save even more dough. Yippie! I'm super excited about that.

I was preparing for a meeting last night with our financial adviser to talk about retirement savings. As I pick Salem up from school everyday, she always asks me who will be coming to the house that evening. (We entertain...quite a bit) I told her that nobody she knew was coming, just mommy's financial planner and daddy and I had a meeting with him to talk business. She seemed interested but didn't ask any more questions.

A little later, she came down from her room,
"Mom? Where is your fine-ass boy?"
I had to think about that for a second..."Who?!"
Not quite putting together what she was talking about I asked her if she would clarify. Because I was wondering that very same thing earlier that day, gee, where is my fine-ass boy?"
"When are you doing business with that boy you said was coming?" Again! Now i'm doing business with the fine-ass boy! Who in the hecky-heck heckerson is she talking about!
Then it clicked.
"Oh!, you mean Brent, our finance guy! He's coming in just a few, you'll get to meet him I promise. He's not here to play though, just to talk to mommy and daddy."
"I know." She said. "But I think I'm going to pretend like I'm shy when he gets here and then he'll want to talk to me."

Dude. She sure has a plan on how to get the fine-ass boys to pay attention to her. Scary.

Men's Room

We were out having lunch today at a little Mexican place in EAV, La Casita.
It's my favorite restaurant down there, GREAT tamales. Anyway, Salem had to hit the potty and I took her to one of the bathrooms. I couldn't tell if it was the men's or women's room, so we just went in anyway. As I closed the door she turned and looked up at me and said,
"Is this the men's room?"
"I don't think so." I said.
She wrinkled her nose and made a frown before she whispered,
"Well, is sure smells like the men's room!"

Thirsty

last night at our house, Chuk had a party for some colleagues from work. There was quite a crowd here, upwards of 25 people.

The morning Salem woke up and came downstairs and noticed all the beer bottles on the counter that I had rinsed out to be recycled. With her eyes opened really wide she said, "Mommy! Did daddy drink all that beer--wow!"
Before I could answer, she finished her thought, "He must have been REALLY thirsty!!"

The Whole World

Chuk: "Go give salem another hug goodnight, she told me that she wanted to give you a hug bigger than the house and even bigger than the whole neighborhood."
me: "ok"
I went to give her a hug in her bed, the 3rd time I said goodnight tonight. She sat up in her bed and said,
"Mommy, I want to hug you bigger than the whole world!"

Awwww, sweet.

Car Pool

Salem goes to school at a nearby church. They have what they call "car pool" in the mornings and afternoons; this is where we line up in our cars and the kids are removed from the vehicles one by one by the church staff and walked into class. It's pretty efficient, I don't have to get out of the car and she's safely whisked into her classroom by some blue-hair church volunteer.

This morning Chuk brought her to school and as they pulled up to "car pool" Salem made a solid statement.
"Hey! This is the afternoon car pool where you pick the kids up!"
him: "No, I'm dropping you off, you get out of the car and go to school."
her: "No, It's the afternoon!"
him: "Salem, you know it's not the afternoon, and you're going to school!"
her: "Well, I know! You can just pull up, I'll get out of the car, walk around and get back in the car and we can go home and just forget about school!!"

Nice plan. I'm sure she'll have an arsenal of skipping-school techniques by the time she hits middle school.

hey! am I crazy?

I quit my job today. I just want to find something else to focus on. Any suggestions? I promise, I'm only a little nuts.

Brain Hole

Salem and I were out getting pizza with some of my work buddies. She jumped up on the lap of one of my co-workers and looked in his ear and said,

"I see some slime down here in your brain hole!"

Poor guy, I bet he had no idea he even had a 'brain hole'.