She Wants You to Know

Salem would like me to let everyone know...

"That she is kind of a big deal."

That is all.

Got My Hair Did

I recently got my hair cut and highlighted for my dad's wedding. I just needed a bit of an update. Alright, a BIG update.

Yesterday, I had painstakingly blown my hair dry in an effort to show off my new look. As Salem and I left the house we both were pounded by rain. She had on her cute little rain coat and hat, but I didn't have an umbrella. (I have never been able to maintain ownership of said item, no matter how cute they are, an umbrella is something I simply can't keep up with.)

With that said, my new 'do got drenched and flattened. The highlights have made my hair sorta snarly when it's wet to add insult to injury. So in the car I was lamenting with Salem over the fact that I had painstakingly styled my "new" hair to have it completely ruined by the weather. She looked over at me and said..

"Mom, when we get home I'm gonna hand you a brush. You're a mess."

"Thanks kid!" I thought to myself.

Salem's New Hair Cut!

After getting her hair cut, she turned to me and said...

"Don't I just look like the cutest thing you've ever seen!!!"

Me: "Most certainly. You ARE the cutest thing I've ever seen!"

Puffy Shoes

While I was strapping her in her carseat this morning:
"Oh no! Mom, you're wearing those shoes that make your feet all puffy! TAKE THEM OFF!!"

I looked down, and sure enough, I had on the uber-high heels that caused some slight edema in my feet. It was really because they're mary janes, and the ankle strap was too tight.

me: "It's okay babe, the reason why my feet got puffy before was becuase mommy had the strap buckled too tight."

her: "Oh. Well, I guess that's okay...But if your feet get all puffed up, don't come crying to me about it."

At least I can depend of my 4 year old to give me a big dose of tough-love.

Like Soup? Urban Dictionary's Idea of What a Boss Lady Is:

Boss Lady: An authoritative individual who has mastered the craft of soup making. This individual demands perfection not only from herself and her soup, but from her customers as well. She runs an efficient and regimented operation. The customers who wish to experience the pleasures her soup can provide must act in accordance with the prescribed policies and procedures. Usage: I went to order some mushroom wild rice soup but Boss Lady threw me out when I horsed around in line.

Warm Patty - Spongebob Reference Overload

Salem for one reason or another doesn't like to share stories about school. However, I persist in asking about her day, hoping that one day she'll actually enjoy speaking to me about it.

What she does enjoy is Spongebob Squarepants.
If you're a mom or a dad with a kid 3 years old to 10ish, my guess is you watch it too. Well, we watch the Sponge A LOT. The kid is obsessed.

When I asked Salem how school was the other day she plugged her nose and in a perfect rendition of the character Squidward she said "Quiet Spongebob, I'm trying to play the clarinet!" This was her way of telling me to shut up. Pretty clever, I suppose.

This week, it got a little chilly here in the ATL. (damn you fake spring!)
Much in line with her dislike for sharing stories about her day at school, the kid detests being cold. Yesterday, she told her dad she wished she was a krabby patty because "it looks so nice and warm being on the grill."

Giant Rubber Snake

Salem has a new favorite toy: A giant rubber python. Out of all the toys she has, she chose the snake to accompany us on our outing yesterday. we went to visit a friend of mine at a university where she's studying for a teaching degree. She needed a subject - Salem came to her mind first.

Salem and I entered the building where the study was held and she immediately started hiding around corners, tossing the snake at unassuming passers by while making hissing sounds. Fantastic! (No, she's not with me!) Then, she was whisked off  into the study and was asked to leave ol' snakey-poo behind with mommy. I then went into the restroom and upon exiting I was stopped by a woman in the hall.

"What is that? Did you find it in the restroom" She asked me.
"Um, it's my daughter's rubber snake...I'm holding it....for her."  I felt like an idiot explaining this. Then I wondered why this woman had to know the details of this stupid thing. Why do you think she thought I found it in the bathroom?

I should have said, "Yes, I found this giant rubber snake in the toilet and thought i should fish it out so that I could preserve the plumbing..."

People are so weird.

Salem's Recipe

We were out last night having dinner at a Mexican restaurant with the Sylvesters when I got up to use the lady's room. While I was gone, Salem announced that she had her very own recipe to share with them.

Ingredients:
Collard Greens
Peeps
and a little Olive Oil.

Easter's around the corner, so here's something to add to your dinner table. I'm surprised she didn't say E.V.O.O. for the olive oil.

A Special Request

In the car yesterday:

"Mom?"
me: "Yes dear?"
her: "I wish you had a big ol' van!"
me: "Why? Don't you like my IKEA car?" (That's what my man calls my basic model VW wagon. It has hand crank windows, no cruise control, a tape deck not a CD player, and has absolutely no leg room. And I'm 5'2")
her: "If you had a van, you could fit me, Lola, and some other friends, and even a big bag of mayonnaise in it!"

..."Good idea Salem! I was wondering how on earth I'd fit big bags of mayonnaise in mommy's car. Thanks for the tip!"

New Game!

The Kid and I have a new game. It's where I hide around the corner from where she's quietly playing with her Barbie House; I jump out and loudly say "GOLDEN GRAHAMS" in a silly squeaky voice. She pretends like it bothers her but she chuckles to herself and begs me to do it again.

Yes, we're weird.

Dirt!

Spring has sprung here in the ATL. It's beautiful out, the birds are chirping, the daffodils are in bloom and the kids are frolicking outside.

My kid is certainly getting her fair share of outdoor play. Daily she's been coming home with her choice pink outfits pretty much destroyed by mud, dirt, grass stains and the like. I've tried Spray N Wash, Stain Sticks, (sometimes straight up bleach) and nothing seems to get her clothing clean. It's really annoying. I even tried Billy Mays' stuff, OxiClean as he practically scares me into the purchase. Have you seen his commercials? Man, I feel better knowing I have some of that stuff around ;)

I purchased her some darker clothing, like boy's brown dungarees and rust colored shirts. She HATES anyting that's not "pink and girly" and has shut my wardrobe picks down.

Any suggestions on stain removal? Any takers for some boys size 3T rugged pants?

Giant Hill - here's a good way to get down.

Salem and I went to the park yesterday to soak up this lovely weather.

We grabbed an old cardboard box, broke it down to furnish a make-shift sled. We located the tallest hill, sat on our sled, pushed and surprisingly we hauled A$$ down to the bottom of the hill.

Instructions for making your own Sled:

1. Locate a cardboard box large enough to break down and sit on. In this case, a cereal box would do just fine for Salem. For me, I'd go with a box from Dell. Nice 'n sturdy.

2. Break it down, flatten it out, take all residual tape off. You've got to 'slick up your ride'. If you have surf wax - rub it on the bottom surface. I can not say I've experimented with this step, however, it does make me sound more professional.

3. Find a really steep grass covered hill. For a real thrill ride, it needs to be just before the onset of spring - like RIGHT NOW. The grass needs to be dead and dry in order for you to move quickly down the hill.

4. Sit on your 'sled' and hold the box top flaps and get someone to push you. -Or- do like I did and lay on your tummy while slightly curling the front end of cardboard. That's the ticket!

5. Slide down!

note: Salem slid down over and over. Most of her rides ended in her flipping over and sliding down the hill without the cardboard. Next time I'll dress her in all brown as her cute pink shirt is now streaked with grass stains.

Favorite Movies

Salem's top 5 movie picks as of March 1st 2009:

Ghost Busters
Casper the Friendly Ghost (Christina Ricci, 1996)
Edward Scissor Hands
Nightmare Before Christmas
Pippi Longstocking

See any trends here? Man, she's a Tim Burton lovin' fool. (just like her mommy)

What's your TOP 5?

March Madness!

March has come in like a lion here in Atlanta. It started snowing this morning has has not let up for several hours. Salem and I went out to play in the odd weather and the first thing she did was begin munching away at it.

Here, you see her enjoying 'snow on the cob'. She discovered a snow-covered pine cone and decided to dine on it. (No, it's not a dog-bar!) I know what you're thinking, how could I let her eat snow? Well, believe me, all efforts of stopping her from eating the snow have always failed. So, I just had to let it go.

This is my apartment parking lot. I never thought I'd see this, especially in March.
We came inside from our snow outing and immediately she requested a hot chocolate. It's been fun enjoying this slice of real winter. (However, I'm very happy that this weather event is a rare moment. I'm a warm weather kinda gal!)

And then, we got an idea! Since we're not accustomed to snow in the Hotlanta, we're a bit under prepared for really appreciating the fun. We got our laundry basket out and made a make-shift sled for her to ride down the hill. It was hilarious.